Birthday wishes
Brothers are the hardest people to be sincere with and the most pleased when someone manages it. These six get there with a joke first and the real line second.
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Continue writing opens that message in the card with the words already in it, so all that is left is to change a word and send it. The last message is the longest of the six, and it is the only one you have to copy across yourself.
Happy birthday, bhai. Still the best person to have on my side of an argument, and the first person I'd call if something went badly wrong. Have a proper day today, and let the family make their fuss of you.
Continue writing with message 1Happy birthday. You've held more together this year than you've told anybody about, which is very much your style. Take the day off from being the reliable one. Everything else can wait until tomorrow.
Continue writing with message 2Happy birthday. Thank you for years of covering for me at home and never once mentioning it afterwards. I don't think I've ever said that properly, so I'm saying it now. Have a very good day today.
Continue writing with message 3Happy birthday. Another year older and you still cannot pack a bag properly or arrive anywhere on time. Never change. Cut the cake, eat far too much, and ignore your phone for one entire day.
Continue writing with message 4Happy birthday, bhai. Different cities, same arrangement: you send nonsense at midnight, I reply at two minutes past. Hope this year gives you a lot more of the good, boring, nothing-went-wrong weeks.
Continue writing with message 5Happy birthday, bhai. We don't do this sort of message, so read it once and then we can go back to sending each other nonsense at midnight. You've turned into somebody genuinely worth having around, you've helped me out more times than I've ever acknowledged, and I'm glad you're my brother. Enjoy today.
Say the serious thing and admit you are dodging saying it out loud. Between brothers that admission is the whole trick — it names the awkwardness instead of pretending it is not there, and it lets a genuinely warm sentence through without either of you having to acknowledge it later.
Keep the insult accurate. A generic jibe is filler; a specific one — the bag, the driving, the fact that he is always forty minutes late — is affection in the only dialect many brothers accept.
One card, sealed, that says the thing neither of you would say on the phone.
Write his birthday cardIt arrives as a sealed envelope they open on their phone.